Not that men really only have one erogenous zone. No, that is certainly not the case. Men are just as sensitive all over their bodies as women. But their attention is already focused on their penis in early childhood. It is also very present and extremely receptive to tactile stimuli. And this in turn often leads to a man focusing his erotic attention on this part of his body later in life and not even discovering how beautiful other touches can be. The opposite is true for women. The vulva and vagina tend to be left out of their parents' attention, which means that even later as adult women they do not have a proper relationship with this part of their body. This means that there is still a lot to discover for both of them!
The map of erogenous zones
The erogenous zones are spread all over the body of both sexes. From the crown of the head to the sole, so to speak. Has anyone ever gently blown in your ear and made your scalp feel electrified? Then we have two erogenous zones at once: The scalp and the ears. The scalp is one of the so-called non-specific erogenous zones. These are all areas where our skin does not contain such a high density of nerve endings. This also includes the neck (oh how beautiful when she stretches her head back and he runs his lips over the delicate skin), the back, the sides and the insides of the arms and legs. In contrast, we have the specific erogenous zones with a higher density of nerve endings, which include the auricles, but also the eyes, the oral cavity, nipples and the genital area. Touch is particularly intense here. But it is only when we are aroused that our erogenous zones really come to life!
You will have noticed from this list that there is actually no area of our body that is not erogenous. We just have to be able to allow it and trust our feelings. You are welcome to make an appointment with your partner for this special journey. This also means giving yourself enough time. By this I also mean that you don't switch to the usual program after the first two minutes. Make an appointment for 15 minutes per partner, for example. This reduces the pressure to perform and you can concentrate better on the sensations. Find a nice place, the bed, a large sofa, the bearskin in front of the fireplace, make sure the room temperature is pleasant, dim the lights, maybe play some nice music. Anything that makes you feel good.
Enjoy the touch
Who wants to go first? The person who wants to lie naked on their stomach and let their partner pamper them. You can caress your bodies from top to bottom with light, firm, stroking or tapping touches. Or from bottom to top. Feathers, warm massage stones and ice cubes can support the touch. You can nibble, kiss, lick and suck. The point is to find out what is pleasant and what is not. It is also important that the active partner receives feedback. Moaning, grunting, guiding hands, turning away, coming towards, everything is allowed. Both partners should be comfortable on this journey of discovery, so the active partner can also pay attention to what he or she likes and doesn't like. It may also be that one of you is getting too much. Then you can stop, take a break or swap roles.
The journey could look like this: From the feet and toes, over the insides and outsides of the legs to the curve of the bottom. From here, continue over the back and sides to the neck, ears and hairline. Here it's time to turn around once and continue down the front of the body. Now I have already mentioned the different valuation of the female and male genitals. So if you are moving towards the hottest erogenous zones, pay particular attention. For him, concentrate on the touches outside the penis. All over the body, but especially on the scrotum, perineum and possibly the anus, depending on how far you want to venture. She, on the other hand, can allow her vulva and vagina to be touched and feel inside herself. To do this, it makes sense for him to touch the outer and inner labia, the clitoris and the vaginal entrance individually. To take away her shyness, he can also tell her what he sees, how it feels and whether he enjoys it.
And with that, I wish you a wonderful journey! And of course you can also explore yourself. The same conditions apply as for a couple, i.e. take your time, create a pleasant environment and try out different forms of touch. And here, too, it's important not to head straight for the goal. The journey is the goal!
Anja Drews, sexologist for ORION