How important is penis size for good sex?

Penis superlatives - Is bigger always better?

We live in a world of superlatives - the bigger, the more expensive, the faster, the better. For some things we reach our limits, for others the trend has reversed. Breasts, for example. I'm really happy when I see naked female bodies with small natural breasts in my current favorite series Californication. But I have other things to complain about there. In the very first scene of this sexually charged production, the clitoris is given pride of place as the guardian of the female orgasm. Nevertheless, the women come in rows as soon as the main character Hank Moody sticks his penis inside them. There is no sign of anyone even remotely caring about the little pearl of pleasure. Does Hank have such a big penis that this is simply not necessary? Is a big penis even the solution? And are there penises that are too big? Or rather penes - which is the correct plural. But then nobody understands me, so I'll stick with the incorrect form. Penises.

via Anonymous

10/17/2016, 16:02

Welche ist die richtige Penisgröße? Gibt es diese überhaupt? — Big or small? What is the ideal penis size? And does "the bigger the better" necessarily apply to the male sexual organ?

A penis alone does not make you happy

The penis has always been the focus of male interest and I would argue that most men would rather have a few centimetres more than less. Even back in the Renaissance, men put a visible pubic capsule over their penis and thus feigned more size and seemingly permanent erections. However, I am not aware of any times when particularly small penises were popular. People keep asking me whether this or that size is enough to satisfy a woman. As if a penis alone would make us happy. As if hands, tongues and, above all, words are not just as important. Only all of this together makes a good lover! And the most important pleasure center lies outside the vagina. I honestly can't understand it when a woman doesn't want a man just because she doesn't like his penis. Sex isn't just about sticking it in, and love certainly isn't.

But there are indeed men who are so well endowed that they not only give us pleasure but also pain. Unfortunately, I can't define the exact length or diameter at which this is the case. Because it always depends on the woman. Some are not squeamish and like to be penetrated hard. Others prefer a gentler approach. And our vaginas are also different lengths. A woman who is REALLY aroused and whose vulva and vagina are well supplied with blood, swollen and really wet will feel the thrusting in and out very differently to a woman who is already cramping up from fear. But if I now write: With large penises, please make sure that your lover is sufficiently aroused, you might think that this is not so important with the smaller specimens. That's nonsense, of course, because it's always important, but unfortunately it's often neglected. And if intercourse is not so great, no one should be surprised and not blame it on penis size alone.

What I advise lovers with extra size

If a woman is not aroused and not sufficiently wet, insertion and friction - especially with large projectiles - can actually be painful and can even cause small fissures in the sensitive mucous membrane. The generous use of lubricants can help here. And you don't always have to dive in completely straight away. Sex is a game and you can play wonderfully with a penis. A little in, a little out, a little caress on the clitoris, a little more in and out again. There is strength in calm. I wouldn't recommend the doggy position, where the passive partner kneels on all fours. This is because the penis actually disappears as far as it will go if you behave impetuously. This could be very uncomfortable for the sensitive cervix. When lying down, however, the buttocks cushion a little in length. If the woman is sitting on her partner, she can decide for herself how far she wants to go. The same applies to the blow job. It's nice when the penis disappears into the mouth as far as it will go. But if that's not possible, you don't have to give up all the pleasure. It's great when the glans is licked and caressed. And after all, we still have two hands with which we can hold the shaft.

Small penis? Wonderful! After all, we have another orifice and I can definitely hear more experimentation when the penetrating penis has more pleasing dimensions. As for the vagina: as mentioned above, it swells when aroused, becomes tighter and encloses the penis even more tightly with this so-called orgasmic cuff. Add to this rather circular movements and the sensitive vaginal entrance is optimally stimulated.

Announce or surprise?

So bigger is not better and smaller is no drama either. Should a man talk about his above-average or below-average penis? Yes, in my opinion he should. Certainly not on the first date - that would be going too far. But later, when it's time to get down to business. And in a way that makes it clear that he knows how to deal with it. This is a good way to anticipate a problem, regardless of whether the penis is particularly large or small. After all, nothing is more disappointing than suddenly having nothing to see or a lance protruding to such an extent that your blood freezes in your veins at the sight of it. Anyone who manages to combine this with a pinch of humor is sure to have won over their counterpart.

Anja Drews - qualified sex educator for ORION