It almost seems a bit desperate how dating sites are constantly throwing new numbers onto the market that are supposed to convey the message: Everything is nothing without a partner. Just recently, Parship announced that 82% of German singles are longing for true love. But the really exciting point is somewhere else entirely: one in three people are now single. And these singles may be longing for true love (who isn't - even some married couples are said to feel that way...), but until then most of them are happy and having lots of fun. Not only that - new studies, for example from Washington State University, prove it: People who live alone are more likely to have meaningful, fulfilling careers that they value, and feel they are in good hands with their friendships, which they can also cultivate much more intensively than non-singles.
Katharina (42) from Stuttgart: "I enjoy my single life to the full"
"Stefan and I had been together for ten years when he told me that he had fallen in love with a colleague. Of course, it blew my mind at first. My best friend caught me, comforted me - and at some point said: 'Come on, get up, straighten your crown, carry on'. And I flinched for a moment and then thought: why not? It doesn't get any worse than this. The next Saturday, we got dressed up and set off. We had so much fun! Since then, we've always come up with great things to do. We go to the seaside for the weekend, we recently went to the spa and we often go dancing in the evenings. And of course we also meet nice men. Sometimes I even have dates that I just enjoy. Because I don't really want anything permanent. My new motto is: men only as outpatients, no more inpatients! I really love my single life. If only because I don't have to compromise or answer to anyone. I do what I want. And nobody talks me into it. It's wonderful. If I were to make another commitment, it would have to be to an absolutely amazing guy."
Margret (64) from Potsdam: "I didn't want to go on living so lovelessly"
"It was a classic. Wolfgang and I got married in our late 20s, had two children, bought a little house, I gave up work because of the children, at some point I started working part-time again, then full-time. Then the children left home. Just like thousands of other families. But one small event set something in motion that changed my life completely. For my 60th birthday, my sister Karin gave me the gift of a visit to a restaurant. It was a great evening. There was a couple around 70 sitting at the next table, who were making out romantically. We both thought they were so great! And then we asked each other the question: how happy are we with our partners? The question has stayed with me ever since. I took a close look at my relationship and was shocked. Wolfgang and I were living completely at cross purposes. When was the last time we had hugged each other? I didn't know. Kisses? There were no more. Evening conversations about how each other was doing? No. When I asked him about it, he just said it was normal after all those years. That's when I finally realized: I didn't want to go on living like this. When I moved out, many people shook their heads. 'At your age,' was the one I heard most often. But I didn't care. I went through with it and I'm doing brilliantly today. I've even had a few dates. And I have lots of great friends and acquaintances. I'd rather grow old with them than in a shared flat with a man I no longer feel much for."
Nine good reasons to be single >>>
Tips and information on the topic: Living alone has its advantages
Psychologist Dr. Doris Wolf often advises couples in crisis and has written many successful guides on the subject. The topics of relationships and conflict situations, separation and new beginnings are the most common in her practice. She is convinced that Each of us can change our lives if we change our attitude. More information at www.partnerschaft-beziehung.de
Why are many people afraid
"There are different reasons. They associate being single with personal failure or are afraid of being left without support in old age. Some fear loneliness. They believe they need a partner in order to survive in life. Some also need financial support from their husband."
Can the loneliness of living alone also make you ill?
"That depends entirely on how you view living alone and how you organize your life. You can also feel lonely in a partnership if it works badly. Loneliness makes you ill if you see yourself as a victim who is unlovable, or if you live alone involuntarily. If you can give yourself satisfaction, you won't get sick from being alone."
Where does the courage of many women to live alone come from?
"Women today are better off economically and are often not dependent on their husband's salary. What's more, women are more self-confident, allow themselves to express their own needs and live according to their own wishes. Today, they are taking the right to be active on their own."
What are the biggest advantages of single life?
"You can act according to your own wishes and needs without having a guilty conscience. You don't have to compromise or be considerate and possibly be accountable. Discussions are over for good and you can choose the people you surround yourself with."
What's the best way to approach living alone?
"By asking yourself the question: What do I want in life, what is good for me and makes me happy? Everyone has to decide that for themselves. You should act accordingly, no matter what the answer to this question is."