1. in search of unusual sex toys
2. get out of bed!

1. in search of unusual sex toys

"Oops, what's that on the bedside table? Is that a hand flatterer?" Do you know what a hand flatterer is? They can be smooth, round stones or other objects made of materials that feel good in the hand. Some sex toys also fulfill these conditions and don't even look completely different. So it's no longer embarrassing when friends inspect the new apartment and find a forgotten sex toy lying around somewhere. Unless, of course, they know their own way around and know right away. But then again, it's no longer embarrassing and you can give each other knowing looks.

What friends can't know about, however, are the household items that you might use in your lovemaking. Or, even spicier, you may be enjoying yourself alone and keeping a sweet secret from your partner!

Take a look around and let your imagination run wild!

You'll find lots of things in the household that you can use. It's entirely up to you what you try out.

• Ice-cold stainless steel spoons can be used to paint wonderful patterns on bare skin. Perhaps even blindfolded? You are sure to have matching scarves or shawls in your closet.
• How about using a spatula as a paddle? Paff, on your bare bottom! But be careful, this can also backfire if there are no agreements in this regard. I'm reminded of a scene from Ally McBeal in which he thinks she wants a hearty slap on the backside. And so he grabs her hairbrush and smacks it. However, she doesn't have the expected reaction - on the contrary, she freaks out completely! Obviously this was just a fantasy.
• Let's get back to the hairbrush: the flat side is perfect for spanking. The other side, however, is excellent for stimulating the skin. Gently run the brush over your skin and test it on yourself.
• Do you have a feather duster or a feather? These gentle touches also feel wonderful. The handle of the feather duster can certainly be used creatively. If it is to be inserted into body orifices, please put on a condom first!

What else do you have in the kitchen? Household foil. There are actually several uses for it:

• Firstly, there is a preference for wrapping the whole body in the foil and using it to hold it in place. It can be particularly attractive when the skin starts to sweat.
• If you don't want to go quite that far, use the foil as a restraint band. And when you are finished, you can simply cut it.
• Last but not least, at least from what I can think of, household foil can be used as a means of safer sex. Not as a substitute for a condom! But as protection during lickjob or anilingus. You cut a piece ten by ten centimeters and place it on your vulva or anus before you start with the tongue art. That's it!

Speaking of safe sex. If you misuse fruit or vegetables, please put a condom on them. Even with organic products, there is no guarantee that there are no pesticide residues on the skin or peel. And these can be transferred particularly easily via the mucous membranes. And if you do use your sunflower or olive oil, please remember that oil breaks down the material of condoms, making them porous. If safe sex is the order of the day, then please only use water-based lubricants!

Water play of a different kind

• Many women appreciate the pressure of the water jet from the shower head. Incidentally, these can also be bought new at affordable prices from DIY stores if the old shower head doesn't meet your expectations. Small water games under the shower or in the bath are therefore a great pleasure both alone and with your partner.
• There is another interesting object in the bathroom: the toothbrush. Many a clitoris has been pampered with this little brush. Many brushes also have a flexible bend in the handle. This allows you to stimulate the G-spot on the front wall of the vagina. Just give it a try!
• The washing machine is supposed to be another insider tip. Put it on the spin cycle and off you go! However, many washing machines today are built underneath and therefore no longer suitable for vibration games. This brings to mind the radio presenter Howard Stern. In the movie biopic, he had a listener sit on her speaker and then vibrated it by humming its lowest tones. I hope I've just described it clearly. It wouldn't be necessary today anyway, because most people no longer have speakers of this type.

An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure

We've already found quite a lot. But still be careful. You should make sure that everything you insert is either clean or covered with a condom. For everything around the anus, please remember that there is an anti-return device. Because once it's gone, it's not so easy to get it out again.

On the subject of pats: I would advise against using leather belts. You can easily overdo it with the pain. And under no circumstances should the belt buckle hit your body! In general, you should find out exactly which parts of the body are at risk when playing such games. The kidneys, for example, must not be injured under any circumstances. And just to be on the safe side, I would also like to mention that under no circumstances should you put cling film over your face!

2. get out of bed!

Without having to resort to surveys or studies, I can justifiably claim that the bed is the Germans' favorite place for short or extended sex. It stands to reason, after all, it's the place we go to every night and where we spend a third of our lives. What's more, most couples sleep together in the same room and in the same bed. Some even share a large comforter. The opportunity for sex practically arises by itself, day after day. What could be more natural than to use this intimate togetherness for erotic lovemaking before going to sleep or immediately after waking up? And yet so many couples complain about their desire and sexual activity waning.

Everything else in the relationship is planned. Exciting cultural events, delicious culinary delights, exciting leisure adventures. Only the sex should always come naturally and of course remain exciting. And without having to do anything about it. In other words, lying down. When you read this, it becomes clear that something is wrong here. So we should change something about the routine. Now, it's not everyone's cup of tea to go out into nature or hang around in stairwells or dark corners of houses to add a little spice to your love life. But can't you find something within your own four walls? Fancy a little change of scenery? Let's take a look at what we can find here. It could get uncomfortable from here. And exciting.

The very personal peep show

The armchair: Let's start in the bedroom. If the bed is off limits, what else is available to you? A comfortable armchair where you usually put your clothes? Excellent! Why not stage a little intimate peep show?

- Move the armchair into view in front of the bed so that one of you can watch the other from here. Naked or dressed, as you prefer. Although there is a slight power imbalance when dressed, which can also have its charm.
- The other person undresses with relish, gets on the bed and starts the solo show. Always slowly caressing the whole body, turning and moving, offering a change of perspective. You decide when the other person is allowed to enter, or if at all.

The window: There is also a window in every bedroom. She can lean on a windowsill while he enters from behind. The view from the window is what makes it special. Do you have neighbors who might be able to see you? A pinch of fear can really enhance the chandelier experience. But you don't need to leave the curtains completely open. Just a small gap is enough to enjoy the feeling of possibly being caught. Do you have large French windows that lead out onto the balcony or terrace? What could be better than doing it outside on a warm summer night?

Sexual pleasure instead of watching TV

The sofa: Let's take a look around the living room. Pleasant temperature? Erotic music? Dimmed light? A sofa with a side rest? Leaning forward, she can hold her beautiful backside out to him. All he has to do is slide into the delicious wetness. Quite simply. He, on the other hand, can sit down and present her with his magnificent privates. She can't help but kneel in front of him and take his bulging erection into her mouth. A cushion protects her knees from the hard floor.

The shelf: Well, it hasn't been that uncomfortable so far. Is there a shelf? If possible, one that is firmly screwed to the wall. Because this can be used wonderfully for small bondage games. While one or the other of you is tied up here, the other can let him or her wriggle around. Blindfolding creates a special attraction. This means that the other person does not know what is going to happen next. The other senses are sharpened all the more. Even the smallest noise will make you tremble and increase your desire. Heating pipes or chest of drawers can certainly be used for this. And once you've got the idea, you're sure to find even more possibilities.

The kitchen is not just for cooking

All eyes are on the kitchen table: Here, not only the food but also your loved one can be arranged decoratively. Lying on her back, she can wrap her legs around his neck while he enjoys the best view of her magnificent breasts. He can caress them with both hands or grip her hips. If it's too hard for her back, blankets spread out on the table will help. And if there are any problems with the height, an inflatable love pad is sure to solve the problem.

Kitchen chairs? If she sits astride it, they can look each other in the eye. However, this can actually be uncomfortable as her feet are dangling in the air. This puts all her weight on him and she can't move well herself. If she turns her back to him, on the other hand, she can place her feet on the floor and therefore have more control over the depth of penetration and the rhythm. If she spreads her legs, he can reach around her and stimulate her clitoris.

All you have to do is get started

As you can see, there are many options available to you outside of your bed. The only thing you need is the motivation to get out of your warm cozy bed and start the apartment adventure. What other possibilities do you find when you look at your own apartment? ;-)

Anja Drews - qualified sex educator for ORION