Some keep their family secret for a lifetime. Behind this is the fear of irretrievably breaking ties. And often also great shame. In many cases, the point at which you think you could have been honest may simply have been missed. Such secrets hang like swords of Damocles over happiness, and often the best thing would be to speak openly. But then there are the others. The ones that are better kept secret. Because an outing would serve more to ease your own conscience - as in the case of an insignificant affair. Or their explosive power is all too destructive. Then you have to learn to live with the secret - forever.

Christiane (35): "I love my brother, but in a forbidden way"

"It started when we were still teenagers. My brother is three years older than me. I asked him to show me how to kiss properly when I was twelve. Well - he did that, and a bit more. It's been like that ever since. I think my parents knew about it. He's married now, I don't have a relationship. Just him. That's enough for me. I know it's incest and despicable, but I can't help it and neither can he. I love him, he is so infinitely familiar to me, so close. We meet up a few times a month, nobody suspects anything, brother and sister just get on well. I don't want children - so there are no consequences."

Maren (49): "Only my father and I know about my half-sister"

"He often took me with him so that he had an alibi when he met his mistress. She had a daughter with him, I was 13, Silke was five. He made me promise, most solemnly, not to tell anyone about it. I thought it was great to have a secret with Dad, and I've kept my promise to this day. My parents' marriage fell apart, as did his relationship. I have no idea where my half-sister is today."

Franziska (24): "Grandma is a severe alcoholic"

"I've known this for seven years. Grandpa died ten years ago and Grandma couldn't cope. My mother told me because I asked. My family broke off contact. I'm thinking about visiting them."

Susanne (42): "My husband is not the father of our middle son - he's a colleague"

"It happened at a Christmas party. I'd had far too much to drink and then slept on the desk with my favorite colleague Sebastian. It was a one-off for both of us, that was for sure. I had been married to Klaus for five years and we wanted a second child. When I got pregnant, we were both absolutely delighted. Tim was born and we were a happy little family. But the older Tim gets, the more you can see the resemblance to Sebastian. I'll never tell Klaus that, he wouldn't be able to cope. It doesn't matter either. Tim is our son, that's it. Sebastian doesn't know anything either."

Stefanie (49): "Justin thinks dad is dead. But he just ran away"

"I often ask myself whether I did the right thing. Tom split up with me when Justin was a year old. Tom hardly wanted anything to do with him. I then told him to just disappear completely. And he did. I later told Justin that Tom had had a fatal accident. I thought: better no father at all than one who isn't interested."

Andrea (54): "Our daughter is adopted but doesn't know it"

"We took Valerie from a Russian home 20 years ago when she was four months old. Her mother was a prostitute, her father unknown. For Valerie, we are her parents. What would we all gain if she knew where she really came from? She can't contact her parents, there is no address and no name. Telling her the truth now would plunge her into the deepest insecurity."

You might also be interested in this:
Intimate confessions: Yes, I'm having an affair
Intimate sex confessions: What women want
Sex in old age: Intimate confessions
Patchwork family: problems and advantages
After the separation: When children choose dad
Pathologically jealous: When a feeling destroys a relationship
Alexithymia: "I suffer from emotional blindness"