Sex during your period - this is another topic that divides opinion. While some don't care at all whether blood might flow, others are put off by the very thought of it. To the latter, it should be said that nobody HAS to have sex during their period. If you feel uncomfortable

- feel uncomfortable, unclean or unattractive,
- if you are in pain,
- if you are disgusted by your partner's blood or worried about your bedding,

then just don't do it. After all, there are plenty of other days when you can enjoy yourself undisturbed.

However, it's a rumor that women don't feel like having sex during their period. This varies from person to person and of course also has to do with the general state of mind and the aforementioned reservations. If I'm disgusted by something, feel uncomfortable or really don't want to leave a trail of blood on anything or anyone, these thoughts block my desire. That sounds understandable, doesn't it? For other women, lust is particularly high right now. And I have some information for exactly those who feel like it and don't want to miss out on lovemaking during this time.

- Period pains

Some women don't notice much about their period. No abdominal or back pain, little bleeding. This may be due to the use of hormonal contraceptives. Others, on the other hand, really suffer and even regularly miss their period for a day or two.

In addition to painkillers, heat or relaxation exercises, an orgasm can also help. The contractions relax the muscles in the pelvic floor. Pain-relieving endorphins are also released. Not every woman has an orgasm during sex. But sex without an orgasm can also be relaxing if we feel comfortable and safe with our partner. Of course, if no partner is available at the moment, there's nothing to be said against the ever-popular masturbation!

- Tampons

It is important that you do not use a tampon during sex. It has to come out beforehand.

- Firstly, it is rather unpleasant for both of you if there is a hard or well-filled ball of absorbent cotton in the way.
- Secondly, it can slip towards the cervix.
- And thirdly, you have to get hold of it afterwards in order to pull it out.

Soft tampons are an alternative. They are made of hygienic foam, are soft and have no string that can stick out at the bottom. They are recommended for sports, bathing, sauna and sex. A soft tampon is so soft that you probably won't feel it during sex.

However, getting it out can be problematic. The soft tampon does have a tab for removing it. But you have to get hold of it first. If the tampon has slipped a long way up, it is best to squat down and press a little. This will cause it to slide towards your fingers.

- Odors

We are increasingly forgetting to like our own odors, especially intimate odors. I hear this more often from women. It would probably be best if our vagina smelled like rose petals. But this particular intimate scent has a function. It's supposed to arouse us and get us in the mood. It works quite well for men too. With a few precautions, you are also on the safe side during menstruation:

- Blood accumulated in the tampon has a particular odor of its own, especially when it decomposes there. You should therefore change your tampons regularly.
- It is better to use cotton pads or menstrual cups straight away.
- You can shower before sex. Warm water is sufficient, as excessive hygiene, especially with soap and washing lotions, is harmful to the vaginal flora. And if you're already in the shower, you could start here too!
- The bed linen. Yes, once they're soiled, washing them is one of those things. How about putting a towel underneath them right away? Maybe don't use a light-colored towel, but a dark one instead.

- Change position

During your period, you may feel your vagina particularly intensely. Perhaps you don't like your favorite position during this time because the penis penetrates particularly deeply. Or maybe you're not in the mood for acrobatic feats and would rather be intimate with your partner? How about a change of position?

- The missionary position allows you to embrace and look deeply into each other's eyes.
- In the spooning position, you can snuggle up to your partner and let them hold you close.

Talk to your partner about your feelings. There are so many preconceptions and so many different feelings during this time that it is impossible for him to guess what you are feeling.

- Contraception

Quite a few lovers believe that sex during menstruation is safe. At least safe from pregnancy. But that's not true! If we look at the menstrual cycle, ovulation and therefore the fertile days are around the 14th day after the start of the last period. But this is only an average value, which can fluctuate considerably. The egg itself only survives for 24 hours. The sperm, on the other hand, are much tougher and can fertilize the egg up to five or even seven days after it arrives. There are also cycle fluctuations. Fertilization is unlikely, but it can happen. So if you really want to be on the safe side, you should also use contraception during your period.

- Safer sex

Safer sex? Definitely! Just as your period does not protect you from pregnancy, it does not protect you from pathogens. On the contrary, these are even more easily transmitted via the blood. In addition, the cervix is slightly open during your period so that the blood can flow out. This also makes it easier for pathogens to ascend. If you change your sexual partners frequently, you should definitely use condoms during this time too.

Anja Drews - qualified sex educator for ORION

You might also be interested in this:
Irregular periods: These could be the reasons
Changing positions - Which sex position is best?
Rules for your period: mistakes we should avoid
The taboo subject of menstruation: time to talk about it openly
Intimate sex confessions: What women want
Sex in old age: Intimate confessions
Do men really just want sex? And what do women want?
Vaginal orgasm or clitoral orgasm?